"But these same men...as truly interesting as they are...do not make good candidates for the boyfriend label."

Ok, so...

I'm about to step out on what is pretty much (at least I think?) the next big chapter of my life. Practicum. Student teaching. Something that I hope is going to essentially tell me whether or not I'm going down the right path in life. Funny thing about this? I'm probably not. It's strange, but I think I thought I'd know more about what I wanted in life by the time I was 23 years old. When I was 19, (which feels like eons ago...especially when SOME people feel the need to draw attention to your age at every opportunity possible) I think I thought I'd know exactly what I wanted to do, and I think I also thought I would be wanting to get married by this age. I don't. At all. But my best friend from home does...and in a year she will be, because she just got engaged. I'm her Maid of Honour, and frankly the whole things freaks me out a bit. I tell myself  that I have no desire to be married at this age, and I know it's true -  I really don't. But the fact that she is getting married, while I'm not even in a relationship does reveal the VERY different paths we are on at this point in our lives. Am I supposed to be worried about the fact that I'm not in a relationship, or on the path to finding someone to spend the rest of my life with? I'm starting to wonder...?

Especially because I always seem to pick the worst candidates. Oh, and it's not like every time I get involved with a guy, I think he is going to be my "soulmate" by the way (and I say "soulmate" like that because I'm not sure if they exist). I don't. But I can sure as hell tell you that I frequently pick people who are so far away from ever being that person that it's hilarious. There is a whole lot of truth to that I attract "people in problem relationships" and "spontaneous men" thing - let me tell you - but these same men...as truly interesting as they are...do not make good candidates for the boyfriend label. And honestly? I think I'm better in a relationship...mostly because I just do stupid things when I'm not. And while we're at it, I rarely come out feeling better on the other end of these stupid things I do. They never amount to anything good for either party involved, and while I live with no regrets, I'm not sure that there was anything beneficial about any of these situations...especially the ones of late...occurring at all. So, here comes the next salient piece of advice...what is this? Number 7?


If something seems too complicated to have the ending result that you want it too, it probably is. Drop it. Now. It isn't going to mean good things for anyone involved. Especially the ones who don't yet know they're involved. 


Hiding behind my writing,

 - Jenn